Right now I'm VERY anxious and made myself upset.

I've been unemployed since March.
I seriously didn't think about work until 4 months of being unemployed, and I couldn't collect unemployment because my last employment on the books was actually in October '08.

I started looking for work again (seriously) in August and can't seem to get myself together.

Since the death of my mother I started off very friendly and willing to be around people to only return to my reclusive and lonely ways once I stopped working.

I hadn't logged on to a Instant messenger for a whole year now!
I've flitted from DA,watching Anime, Reading Manga, Gaiaonline, ebay, to believing I could sell some of the newer sculptures and creations I made.

In the end I never tried selling my things since after my brush with Ebay- I became to hate selling things through other sites.

I made NO money and shipping for free left me minus any earnings.

So I made myself upset because I lack courage to find a job in the career field I went to college for and I just called my 1st college in hopes to find a job. I have a appointment Friday.

I've become desperate and willing to take anything because the balance in the bank is below my comfort zone.

And I'm still living with my grandmother, but now I sleep on a air bed since sleeping in a bed with a old woman let alone anyone elderly creeps me out.